Archive for July, 2008

Whiny.

I’ve been easily agitated and generally whiny lately.

A game of Guitar Hero got me in a rage.. I almost had the fits because I couldn’t hit the notes on Hard. Somehow, those annoying colourful circles and the instinctive ability to tilt the plastic thing resembling a guitar to get Star Power just got me in such a state, that my thought process looked something like this:

I can play guitar. Therefore I must be able to play Guitar Hero.

If I can’t play Guitar Hero, then I can’t play guitar.

If I can’t play guitar, then I can’t do anything.

If I can’t do anything, then my entire self worth as a human being amounts to nothing.

GARH!

—–

Ended up sulking for half an hour. Poor Girl Chris was trying so hard to lose, so that I would feel better, but that made it worse because getting your arse pitied is worse than getting your arse kicked.

Playing Tekken with Boy Chris wasn’t much fun either. Similar thought process, similar (il)logical sequence.

I can fight. Therefore I must be able to play a fighting simulation game.

If I can’t play a fighting simulation game, then I can’t fight.

If I can’t fight, I am weak and worthless.

GARH!

—–

Also sulked for half an hour.

I sulk a lot.

—–

This all has something to do with the whole job thing, somehow, I think. In my last post I wrote about how I had to write about a certain brand for a job application at a certain marketing magazine. I got the interview, which I thought went well, but I didn’t get the job.

The only job I got was a soul-destroying sales job, which would involve walking up to random strangers at the mall, like an annoying bug, and trying to sell them credit cards. I turned it down, and have been fretting ever since, wondering if I’d just turned down the only job I could get.

I am getting so used to rejection that I’m expecting an “Unfortunately you weren’t right for this position” before even typing up my covering letters.

I am so tired at looking at classifieds, knowing I’m not qualified for half the jobs, and, in all probability, won’t get any of the half I am qualified for.

I am thankful for my supportive friends, who repeat “You’re awesome!” and “You can do it!” like a mantra, but so far all evidence point to the contrary.

I feel an overwhelming rush of WhatthefuckamIdoinghere? mixed with a tinge of Howdidmylifecometothis?

I had such big, big dreams.

And I’m wondering if I can ever get a better job than as an annoying bug selling credit cards.

Mostly I just feel so very, very alone.

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29 July, 2008 at 2:26 pm 1 comment

Updatation.

Wow, have I got major news for you.

I mean…. WOW, have I. Got MAJOR. News. For yooouuu.

Sorry, I feel like since I haven’t been updating in a while, any news I write here is major news. And punctuation just does such a good job at emphasizing any ol’ crap.

So how’ve you been, dahlings? Haven’t heard from you in ages. Good? Good good, that’s very good.

(Exhibit A: Nadia trying to interact with her ‘readers’, exaggerating the total number by using plurals.)

I’ve been good too. Well, kinda. Relatively. You know. At one point since the last update it kind of all came crashing down on me, and by ‘it’ I mean the crippling realization that I am jobless, school-less, very soon to be homeless, and I’m all alone in this foreign (bloody cold) land and I’ve got no support and my world as I know it is over, over, over, and I’ve got no one to blame but myself oh I should just drop to the ground and die now instead of going through the trouble of living and doing anything about it.

/end whinging.

It’s true that I was feeling, howdoyousayit, scared. Terrified, even. Maybe a wee bit sad.

But that has all changed now, relatively, not a complete 360 turn of events just yet, but my attitude and therefore wellbeing has changed. And now, at midnight, in a house in Box Hill South, the occupants of which are… interesting, to put it mildly, and with a bottle of J@ck D@niel’s in front of me, I can now write a half-decent blog post about my recent, mildly entertaining misfortunes, to be read by you, in all probability, the only visitor of this here Blog.

And yes, the whys and hows of me being at Box Hill South, and an almost-empty bottle of whiskey being in front of me, will be explained in due time.

But first, say it with me now…

UPDATATION!

1. Syira the tourist.

My little sister Syira, four years younger than me and is therefore the perpetual ‘little’ brat who couldn’t ride a bike until it was out of fashion, came all the way to Oztraylia during her college break. Because she was arriving so early in the morning and I don’t have a car, I told my mom to tell her to take a cab to my apartment, and my mother’s first response was, “Reti ke dia?! (Would she know how to?!)”

I assured her that yes, she would know how to, because she has traveled all the way to the Netherlands by herself and Oztraylia is, by comparison, a far easier country in terms of communication and such.

She spent a bit more than a week over here, and it was a helluva lotta fun. Mostly, though, it was Guitar Hero.

And shopping. Lotsandlots of shopping.

We also went to the zoo, the Melburn Zoo, which isn’t very nice. It looked really sad and it was about to rain and she actually wanted to turn back and go home but I said NO! You cannot come to Oztraylia and not see a kangaroo, cannot! So we went anyway and she got all happy and the sun started shining the minute we saw kangaroos, wombats, koalas and such. Was fun.

Syira also met most of my friends, which she says could be characters from tv shows. Which I don’t know if it’s a good or bad thing yet.

The final two nights of her stay, there was some trouble with my living situation. The new random Korean dude had moved in (into the room Syira had been using), and I felt bad for Syira for getting it so messed up. And it isn’t very comfortable having a random dude around the house, so with the help of Mommy’s credit card, we packed up the ps2 and Guitar Hero, and checked into a hotel. That wasn’t bad at all, and we got it at a third of the normal rate too, because of a last-minute internet deal I found.

Ah, the internet is really really great. (And if you continue that line with what I think you’re going to continue with I will smack you on the head. If you dunno then, nevermind.)

But anyway, Syira’s stay here was pretty awesome. I miss her already.

Now on to other news, we kinda have a lot to cover…

2. My housemate the ninja.

After Syira left, I went back to my apartment, and thought I’d just live there for the time being while searching for a new place to stay. I still pay rent for my room, after all. And the random Korean dude is polite enough and as far as I can tell, very tidy, so I didn’t mind.

But here’s the thing.

I never see him.

Ever!

I go to the kitchen, and there’s lots of plates there that weren’t there before. But no sign of random Korean dude.

I pass my the bathroom, and the toilet seat is up, when it was down when I used the toilet barely 5 minutes ago.

Shoes appear and reappear. Dishtowels get magically moved around. But I never see him.

So, my friends and I have concluded that he is a ninja.

Well okay… I made the conclusion. My friends merely nod politely and say, “Rooiiight.”

And so, we come to Box Hill South. See, Melburn has this little Chinatown, which is actually just a street, in the heart of the city. Get on a train and head East for about 37 minutes, and you’re in Box Hill, which is one massive Chinatown. You get the Chinese shops that sell everything from bed socks to novelty toilet plungers, restaurants with menus in Chinese and roasted ducks hanging by their necks in the window. A bit to the South is Box Hill South, and that is where Girl Chris lives.

Girl Chris has two housemates; Boy Chris, a hyper, over-achieving and perpetually busy Oztraylian (also an absolute joy to be around), and Clover, a totally random, entertaining girl from China. I’d met them before, and since Girl Chris was going to be away for the holidays, I’ve taken over her room for the time being. I’m also competing her for the Best Housemate in the World title, but I think they just like me because I brought a ps2 and keep the kitchen clean.

Over the last few days I’ve spent a lot of time with Boy Chris, who’s been off work with a throat infection. He’s mostly been kicking my ass at Tekken, but once in a while when we pause the game we have good talks too.

Actually, he is the one who put the bottle of J@ck D@niel’s whiskey in front of me and told me to start writing.

And so we come to #3.

3. The job situation.

Some weeks ago I applied for an internship which I actually really wanted, and got called for an interview. Unfortunately, the Internship, also known as My Entire Self-Worth as a Human Being, did not work out.

They were really nice about it though. Said the competition was really tough, and gave me constructive feedback for my future. But still, being rejected really sucks.

I realized then that I have a habit of putting all my eggs in one basket. Even from before, even applying to universities and such, I would apply to one I really really wanted, and hope it works out. Of course there’s a 50-50 chance of it not working out, and when it doesn’t, I’ve got no plan B. So when my basket was smashed this time, of course I sulked, sobbed, whimpered, and wallowed in self pity for days.

It was quite awful, being stuck in my head like that.

But I eventually got over it and started sending out my CV to anyone who may be remotely interested. I must have applied to 20 jobs in 2 days or something. And yesterday, I got a reply from a magazine, Oztraylia’s version of Adoi (for those in the biz, so to speek), who said I’d been shortlisted along with 12 others, and my first task is to write a 500-word piece on J@ck D@niel’s the brand.

My first plan of action was actually to kill the other 12. Or severely sabotage them, or something. But you know. Have to play it legal, and all that.

I haven’t started on my article yet but I’ll get there, preferably tonight. After a long rambling blog post, you know, 500 words on some brand (which is likely to determine the rest of your stay here in Oztraylia) isn’t so daunting. At 10 pm, Boy Chris came to check on me, and I was having a nap. He switched the light on, told me to make coffee, gave me a pep talk, and put the bottle of whiskey on the desk.

“What’s that?” I said. “For luck?”

“No, it’s for getting pissed after you’re done!”

4. The lucky, lucky internet find.

Besides the job hunt I’d also been busy house hunting (my, my, don’t we sound all grown up and in the Real World now) and I’d been emailing so many random strangers. Do you know how hard it is to find a non-student only, fully furnished place, that isn’t completely crappy?

Very hard, I’ll tell you that.

Out of desperation I put a ‘room wanted’ ad on Gumtree, and got some great responses. I was quite excited about living with a Zen monk, but the winning house turned out to be a beauty. A bit far from the city (even further East than Box Hill) but the house is sooo nice. And clean.

And more importantly, cheap!

And, fully furnished!

And — get this — the woman living there currently, my future housemate, is a Malaysian! A working professional Malaysian, even, who, (and here’s your cue to go omg!) as soon as I told her I’d like to move in, bought me a new dresser! She even picked me up by car from the train station and offered to buy me dinner at a Malaysian restaurant nearby, haha. Then spent some time driving me around, showing me where the shopping centre and bus stops are, which I’ve of course completely forgotten now. But still.

Omg!

So. Yeay!

If all goes well I will be moving my things on the 18th of July. I cannot wait to have a backyard. It is so cute.

5. And now?

Now? Now I think I will get to work on my teeny tiny article. Oh look, this is almost 2000 words already. Now on to the ‘real’ writing… not a problem.

And yes yes this is not My Entire Self Worth as a Human Being and I will try my absolute best but if I don’t get it there are other opportunities, blah blah blah.

So. Y’all be good now.

Toodles!

12 July, 2008 at 11:08 pm 10 comments